Broken Hearts
by merder4everandever
Summary: Three hearts. Two proposals. Way too many secrets. Someone is bound to get broken. SEQUEL TO BROKEN! Merder, Mermark
1. Prologue

**A/N: YAYY!! THE SEQUEL! GAH I've been so excited about this. So, if you're reading this, you have probably read my story Broken. If you haven't I would suggest to read that first but if you don't feel like it that is fine. Just PM me if you have any questions about the plot and stuff. But anyways, this is my first sequel and I am, again, super excited. I hope you all enjoy it! But the only way I will know that is if you review. So, review please **

_Marry me_

_Will you marry me? Take your time…_

Thoughts ran through Meredith's head as she struggled to unscramble the many meanings of those words. Mark proposed. Derek proposed. They both claimed to love her, to need her. They both claimed that there was no one else like her. They _both_ proposed. She sat up in her bed, completely in a daze. It had been about two weeks since those two words escaped Mark's mouth. Luckily, she had been able to avoid both him and Derek. She pulled Derek's ring out of her drawer and re-read the inscription she found earlier. The ring belonged to Rose. Did Derek have it made for her first? Why would he hand her a ring with_ Rose's_ name? She quickly put it away, unable to look at it any longer. Her phone beeped, signaling yet another missed call from Mark. She pressed the ignore button and tossed it to the side. Work had been hell lately. Every time she saw someone even resembling Derek or Mark she would run the opposite direction. She had been running away from them more than she had been performing surgeries. Her friends didn't seem to notice since they were all still recovering from the death of their best friend, which was exactly what Meredith wanted to do. She wanted to think about Alex, not Derek or Mark. She needed time to heal after losing him. She didn't need to be bombarded with ridiculous questions like will you marry me! Nevertheless, she was, and despite her best efforts, she knew she would soon have to deal with the fallout. Another beep came from her phone, this time from Derek. Again, she pressed the ignore button. It had become a ritual for her to press the ignore button every time she heard a beep. Even though it seemed pathetic, it helped calm her down. The only one who knew about the two proposals was her. She didn't want to tell anyone. She didn't want to drag another helpless person into this mess. She needed to deal with this on her own, in her own way. And for now, that way was pressing the ignore button. Pulling herself out of bed, she quickly slipped on her robe and allowed her feet to sail down the stairs. Pouring herself a cup of coffee, she thought hard about how her life had turned out. It made her sick to think that other girls would kill to be in the position she was in. Don't be fooled, it is not all it is cracked up to be. Glancing at the clock, she groaned loudly, disgusted by the fact it was three in the morning. Taking another long sip of her coffee, she sighed. Everything had been a blur since the shooting. Everything had happened so fast since then, when it should've been the opposite. Her feelings for Mark were blurred, same for Derek. She didn't know what she wanted. She didn't know _who_ she wanted. But one thing she was sure of was the fact that she was nowhere near ready. She wasn't ready for a relationship. She wasn't ready for commitment. She wasn't ready for Mark. She wasn't ready for Derek. She, simply, _was not ready._

* * *

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since she spoke to him. It killed him inside. He had called her 50 million times, each time reaching only her voice mail. He knew she needed time to think, what he asked her was huge. But still, she could have called at least. Staring out his hotel window, the darkness settled in. Placing his fingers on the cold window, he began to trail them down the glass. The icy air reached his finger tips and sent shivers down his spine. He should call her again. Grabbing the phone he dialed her number for the fifth time, not caring about the glowing three AM on his clock. Beep. Again, straight to voice mail. Throwing the phone at the wall he buried his face deep into his hands. Everything had been so screwed up since he proposed. He was beginning to regret his decision, but it just felt right, _natural_. The two weeks without her had been nothing but torturous. He tried to find her at work, but everyone he asked either said they hadn't seen her or she was busy. And if he ever did catch a glimpse of her, she was gone within a second. Part of him was screaming to leave her be, she needs the time. But another part of him was worried. What if she didn't feel the same way? So to ease the worries, he had to call. Even the repetitive voice mail eased his nerves because he got to hear _her_ voice, that sweet, amazing voice that caused his stomach to twist and turn. But, then again, the more voice mails he got, the more he was beginning to doubt everything.

* * *

The trailer was cold and wet from the annoying leak that decided to form in his ceiling. He looked up, his eyes wide, as the tiny droplets dripped down the wall and landed on his floor. He didn't bother placing a bucket under the hole. He actually enjoyed the sound. It occupied him, kept his mind off certain things that he didn't want to think about. First, there was Meredith. He hadn't seen her in over two weeks. He called once in awhile, but knew deep down she needed all the space he could give her. He thought about Rose and her ring, which now belonged to Meredith. He wondered if that was a bad idea, if the ring was cursed with bad memories or broken promises. He allowed his mind to event drift towards Mark. Did they really break up? Was she really over him? What about him? Did she still have feelings for him? Then sometimes, on his lucky days, he would think about life in general. He never imagined his life would turn out like _this_, chasing a girl who may or may not love him anymore. It was painful, yes, but there was also something so amazing about it. He had finally found something in his life worth fighting over. After all, he lost his best friend in favor of her, he lost Rose in favor of her, not that, that was a big loss. Come to think of it, he never really liked Rose. She was just _someone_. Someone to help keep his mind off _the one_. Every time he though about how badly he had screwed up, apart of his heart seemed to break off. He brought himself into this mess; he had to bring himself out. But, he wasn't leaving until he had Meredith by his side. He was not leaving without a fight.


	2. Rude awakenings

Her eyes adjusted to the light streaming from the open window. The smell of pine and wood filled her nostrils, as she silently got up from bed, yawning thoughtfully before jumping in the shower. She turned it on cold, shivering as the icy droplets hit her body. She drew in a breath, leaning back her head. The water fell onto her face, traveling in circles before dripping down into the drain. The air was already cold, March quickly approaching. She suddenly began to cry, her tears mixing with the water. Before she understood what she was doing she grabbed the lavender shampoo bottle, holding it upside down before squeezing it with all her might. Thick, lumpy shampoo oozed out, falling in globs onto the tile floor. She pounded her foot against it, blocking out the strong smell. It crept between her toes and stuck onto the soles of her heels before being washed out by the water. Water. It seemed to dissolve everything. Shutting the water off, she shimmied into a towel, her lips blue and chapped. She threw on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt, wiping away some tears as she ran outside, sucking in the chilly air. It whipped against her cheek, practically air drying her soaking wet hair. She began to cough violently, dropping onto the concrete.

"Are you okay?!" she heard a voice yell down the road.

"Leave me alone!" she sobbed, pulling her hood over her face. Whoever it was, needed to give her some space.

"Are you sure?" the voice asked again, now inches away from her face. She silently pulled the hood down, gazing into the eyes of a man no older than her. His hair was messy, golden brown. His eyes were a fierce blue, the color of the sea. And his breath smelled like peppermint and cigarette smoke. "My name's Anthony."

She shook her head, feeling completely stupid. "Meredith," she nodded before compressed laughs began to escape her mouth. "I must look crazy right now."

"I've seen worse," he reassured her, smiling. "Do you need help?" He offered her his hand, which she gladly took.

"Thanks," she sighed, ruffling up her hair. "I just had a mini-panic attack."

"I get those sometimes," he grinned, rubbing his shoe against the ground. "You know what's good for them though?"

She shook her head, pressing her lips together to prevent him from seeing how chapped and purple they were. "What?"

"Coffee." He winked, rubbing a hand through his hair. "Would you like to grab some with me? I'm just on my way downtown to visit a friend, do you have work?"

Her eyes grew large as she glanced at her watch. "Shit," she mumbled, "I have to go."

"Wait will I see you again?" he yelled, hoping that she would look back.

"I don't know, but if I don't…thanks." Then she hopped in her car and drove to the hospital, leaving Anthony alone with the shoes that she forgot to put on.

* * *

"What's the worst thing you have ever done?" Mark questioned, grunting as he helped Tessa carry a huge karaoke machine into the bar.

"I don't know," she panted, sighing dramatically as she dropped the machine. "All I know is that a karaoke machine is a gay ass idea."

"Oh you know you love it," Mark smiled, setting it into the correct place. "I'll be doing this thing all night."

"Dirty," Tessa joked as she hopped behind the bar. "Want anything?"

"Woo, trying to get me drunk this early? That's kinky Tess, way too kinky."

"Shut up," she instructed, pouring him a glass of coffee. "How uhm," she cleared her throat, "the Meredith issue? Did she say yes?" She hated talking about this. In fact, she hated talking about Mark with any other woman but her. It ate at her core, seeming to rip at the insides of her soul. But he was her friend, and she knew that he really loved this Meredith person, even if she didn't want him too.

He shook his head solemnly, looking into his cup. "Nope. She didn't say anything."

"Oh," she let out her breath, "So anyway, how is work?"

"Fine," he murmured, stirring his coffee for no reason.

Tessa huffed, groaning loudly. "This always happens!"

"What?" Mark looked up, taken aback by her sudden attitude change.

"Every fricken time we talk about Meredith you get all depressed and sad and just…UGH!" She screamed, throwing her hands up. "It's annoying." She began to clink and clank glasses and cups onto the shelves, making sure to produce as much noise as possible.

"You are the one that brought it up!" he retaliated, standing up from his chair. "If you don't want me to get all sad and depressed then do not bring it up!"

"I'm trying to help you get over her!"

"What if I don't want to!?"

The room fell silent as he snatched his coat from the rack and stormed out of the bar.

* * *

"I hate Mondays," Rose sighed as she handed Derek a chart. "So much work."

"Mmhmm," he nodded, scanning over the writings. "Me too."

She glanced over her shoulder, deciding whether or not she should bring up the fact that she knew he gave Meredith Grey _her_ engagement ring. "So…" she began, fidgeting with a pen.

"Deliver these to rooms 312," he ordered, slapping the chart back into her hands. "Page me when you do."

"Derek this isn't my job," she stopped him, pushing the chart forward. "Get an intern to do it."

"Come on Rose just deliver the damn thing, okay?!" he yelled, causing a number of heads to turn and watch the spectacle.

"Derek, what has gotten into you?" she whispered, backing up. "You're not who you used to be."

He closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. "People change Rose," he said, walking towards the elevators. "People change."

* * *

"What do we got?" Meredith asked as an EMT rolled out a victim of a gang attack.

"30 year old Caucasian female, was raped by a member of a gang. She has severe injuries to the shoulder and back areas. She also seems to have been burned on her hands and knees and obvious trauma to the head."

"Oh man," one of her interns gasped, removing the string of gauze on the women's head. "Check this out."

Meredith pushed several people out of the way before resting her feet at the young women's gurney. "What is it?"

"Check this out Dr. Grey," the intern swallowed, moving to the side to show her the injury.

"Oh my God," Meredith gaped, her eyes drilled onto an open, severed skull flap of the women.

"What do we do?" the intern asked, fear ridden in his voice.

"Page Dr. Shepherd and Dr. Sloan immediately," she instructed, moving the gurney into the hospital. "Find Dr. Torres as well."

The timid intern nodded, running off to fetch the surgeons.

"Oh my God," Meredith repeated, the words strung into her brain. "Oh my God."

* * *

Derek and Mark responded almost immediately to the page, dropping everything they had in order to help Meredith with her patient. Mark hurried into an elevator, not checking to see who else was on it.

He quickly pressed the ground floor, backing up slowly to watch the numbers descend one by one.

"I never thought it would come to this," Derek said, looking down at his feet.

Mark whipped his head around, swallowing hard at the sight of his former best friend. "Come to what?"

Derek looked up, training his eyes on Mark's. "People change. Do you know that?"

Mark slowly nodded, thinking about the last year. His life had completely turned upside down, and he found himself in the middle of it, falling in love with Derek's love of _his_ life. "People change," Mark repeated.

"And we're left wondering why the hell they do," Derek mumbled before stepping out of the elevator, the sea of EMTs and interns swallowing him whole.

* * *

"You paged?" Derek and Mark said at the same time, stepping into the small cubicle in the pit.

"Yeah," Meredith nodded, pointing at her patient. "She's in critical condition. Her skull flap is nearly off, and her burns are extraordinary. I'm stitching up her arm, which was sliced with a butcher knife and I just…" Her voice drifted, her eyes falling onto the woman who was tortured by a group of men who thought it was fun to kill people. "It was a gang."

Mark glanced at Derek who refused to look his way. "Let me see," he said, pulling a chair toward the skull. Snapping on the rubber gloves, he slid his index and middle fingers over the flap, squinting his eyes at the slice. "We need to get her into surgery, but before that we need," he began to count off his fingers, "A CT scan, an MRI, blood test, everything…I can't operate unless I know who this girl was."

"You can't operate on her skull before I operate on her burns," Mark stepped in, outlining the burns with his eyes. "She needs a skin graph, a major one. Those burns are beyond any degree I could imagine. I need to get those underway."

"Do you not see her skull exposed?!" Derek snapped, pointing a finger at her head. "There is no way in hell you are operating before me."

"Come on Derek, don't let our…issues get in the way," Mark tried, taking a step towards him.

"This is NOT about our issues! This is about allowing this girl another chance to live. This is not about me, or you, or Meredith…it is about her!"

"Okay then we can help each other out on this. I could take some skin from the skull flap; that could be the donor site. We can operate at the same time…it shouldn't be hard."

"No," Derek insisted. "The donor site is usually the thigh anyway; the skull flap would do no good."

"Yes it would! It would work just as well!"

"I'm not working in the same OR with you!"

"Oh so this_ is_ about our issues!"

"SHUT UP!" Meredith screamed, allowing both Derek and Mark to be quiet. "You two are acting like complete babies! Shut up, get this girl healthy, and then beat the shit out of each other after! Just _shut up_!"

Mark looked at Derek, the silence too agonizing for him to bear. Sighing, he extended his hand. "She's right."

Derek glanced down at Mark's hand, waiting patiently to be shaken. Mark wanted a truce. He wanted to end the fighting. But Derek made a promise to himself. He was not backing down without a fight. "Get away from me you son of a bitch," he spat before slamming the door with all the force he could manage on his way out.

Mark shut his eyes, gulping hard before asking, "What should we do?"

Meredith looked up. "We can't get married."

**A/N: I'm bad. I'm sorry I have not updated this! I'm in the wake of my first novel (Yay!!) and graduation is coming up and high school stuff and it's just been hard. I'm sorry!! But I promise more updates will be on the way. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I did…a lot actually because the reason Derek is acting so stand-offish will be determined in the next chapter. (Does he know that Mark proposed? Could be. Is he pissed that Meredith STILL hasn't answered him about the marriage proposal? Possible. Or is it something else? Hmmm, oh how I love this story) And that Anthony dude…pay close attention to him. Alright so I'm gonna leave you with this and another chapter will be coming up! PLEASE REVIEW SO I KNOW I STILL HAVE READERS AFTER MY LAZINESS! **


	3. Going under

_The air was thick with an apparent fog quickly approaching. He sucked in a breath, breathing in the rich Seattle air. It was peaceful up on the mountains, serene. He loved to sit and watch the cool rushing of the river, or listen to the loud chipper of the birds. He would gaze at the high mountains, with their magnificent snow cap covers, wondering how all this came to be. He continued to walk down the path, the trees hovering around him. The leaves and twigs crunched beneath his feet, and the distinct smell of wood clouded his thoughts. He tucked his hands in the pockets of his jeans, imaging the scent of her hair, her soft, delicate lips, the sounds and moans that would escape her mouth whenever he made love to her. It was breathtaking; she was breathtaking. Yet, all of that was slipping away. _

_Walking the mountain trails was how he cleared his head, thought about himself and the ones he loved. The peace and serenity of it all captivated him, making him beg for more. Soon, he reached the spot he was looking for. The site was on top of one of the biggest mountains in Seattle, reaching over thousands of feet. He had climbed it several times before, with no trouble at all. Many seemed to not enjoy the distance, or the walking, but Derek loved it. And the phenomenal scene at the top made up for everything. He gazed out at the layers of mountains, hills, and treetops. They rolled on and on, seeming to never stop. He stood at the edge, balancing his weight so that he would not tip. A pebble escaped from beneath his foot, traveling down to the bottom, vanishing in an instant. He closed his eyes, a single tear escaping._

"_I love you," he whispered, his voice being carried by the air. Then, he sucked in a deep breath, leaned over, and fell. _

Derek gasped for air, waking up suddenly from his dream. He was dripping in sweat, his scrubs drenched. He glanced around the dark on-call room, wondering how he got there. He ran a clammy hand through his hair and down his face, still heaving heavy breaths. He placed a hand on the rail of the bunk, choking lightly. It was just a dream, he thought, leaning back on the flimsy bed. He placed his palm on his forehead, confused and scared. He had never had a dream like that before, where everything; from the scenes, to the smells, seemed so real. He looked up, hearing the knob of the door turn slightly.

"Hello?" a voice murmured, flipping on the switch as he entered the room.

The tiny room filled with light, spreading across the tile floors, traveling up the bunk, reaching Derek's eyes, and forcing him to look at the man standing before him.

"Oh," Mark stammered, backing up, "Sorry…I heard some noises in here, wanted to check to see if everything was alright."

"Noises?" Derek asked, blinking at the florescent light.

"Yeah…" Mark began, looking down, "Like crying or something."

"Oh." Derek touched his eye, wetness spreading across his fingers. "How's the patient?" he quickly asked, desperate to change the subject.

"I actually am glad I found you about that." Mark cleared his throat, sitting cautiously on the bunk with Derek. "I strongly believe we should do it the way I suggested, and this is not a power thing Derek. Believe me. This is what is right for the patient."

Derek nodded, putting his differences aside for the first time. "Okay," he surrendered, standing up, "We'll do it your way."

Then he left the room, lingering a little longer than he should, thinking back to his dream…

…and wondering why it ended with him falling.

* * *

Meredith's eyes began to drift shut. It was nearing one AM, and her patient was still unconscious. She felt a hand on her shoulder and immediately jerked out of her sleepiness.

"Yes," she said, standing up to face the man before her.

He had droopy eyes, deep bags sunken into his face. Scars scratched at both of his cheeks, and the baseball hat that wrapped around his head was battered and torn.

"How is she?" he asked, his voice shaky, tears filling his eyes.

"I'm sorry," Meredith shook her head, "Who are you?"

"I'm James," he said, taking off the cap, "I'm one of the men that did this to her."

* * *

Mark's fingers flew over the dial pad, her number shining brightly on his phone.

"Come on, come on," he pressed, pacing around the nurses' station, phone against ear.

"Hey, you've reached Tessa," her perky voice answered, the voicemail continuing, "I can't come to the phone right now so just try me again or leave a message," Mark groaned loudly, cursing under his breath. This was the third time he had reached voicemail and his patience was running low.

He threw the phone across the room, catching the attention of Rose.

"You know, you could just shut it off," she said, backing away from the computer, "You men are so damn dramatic."

"Why are you here?" he asked defensively, motioning around the room. All the nurses, except a few on the surgical floor, had left.

"I wanted to get some paperwork done," she answered, her voice the same level as his. "Plus I have nothing to go home to so…" Her voice drifted as she filed the rest of the papers, motioning towards a chair.

"Neither do I," Mark sighed, plopping down on the chair. "We're the dirty mistresses."

She glanced up, stopping her work. "Hmmm, now I could have sworn that position was reserved for Meredith."

A small smile played on his lips, and he quickly made sure he wiped it away. "No," he shook his head, his eyes meeting hers, "Not anymore."

* * *

She had to get out of there. No, she couldn't. She was not allowed to leave her patient's side. But there was a gang member, a murderer, right in front of her eyes! That was reason enough to break the rule. Right?

"Uhm sir," she started, reaching for her pager. "I need you to report to the police station please."

"I can't," he sobbed, reaching for her hand, "I can't leave her side."

"Do not touch her hand sir!" Meredith yelled, causing the man to jerk.

"I'm not a bad person doctor," he said after a moment, realizing what was happening. "I just made some mistakes is all."

"Some mistakes?" Meredith repeated, her temper slowly rising. "Some mistakes?! This girl might die! Was that a _mistake_?"

He shook his head, backing away. "I'm sorry," he whimpered.

"Don't tell that to me!" she ordered; her voice steady, the fear gone. "Tell that to _her_."

He looked down, his lip quivering. Then, without asking Meredith for his approval, he bent down and kissed her, soft and gentle. "I'm so sorry Elizabeth. I am so so sorry."

* * *

Derek began to prep the OR. If he was doing this surgery Mark's way, then he was preparing the OR the way _he _wanted it. He arranged the operating table, making sure everything aligned just so. He took out the scalpels and utensils, setting each in a certain pattern. He took out the towels and blankets, dropping them by the table. He placed his hands on his hips, his eyes traveling around the room and up to the gallery. It was empty; not unusual for non-operating moments like these.

He placed the ferry boat cap on top of his head, tying the bow in the back perfectly. Adjusting the cap, he exited the room, deciding to scrub in. He knew he would have to wash again, it was too early. But there was something so…relaxing about scrubbing in. The feel of the cool water against his hands, the way the scrub itched at his skin, digging itself so deep that it hurt. He turned on the water, grabbing a small package of soap from the side. He began to scrub his hands, taking the soap around every corner and inch of his palm and fingers. He scrubbed harder, his palm slowly turning red. He continued again, rubbing harder and harder each time he took a breath. Soon, his skin broke free, blood escaping into the sink. He didn't stop. He grabbed more soap, scrubbing with so much force and might that a dibble of sweat began to form above his lip. Finally, with the drop of the soap, he surrendered, breathing heavily. His skin was chapped and sore, the blood beginning to slowly dry. He leaned into the sink, his eyes fluttering shut. Then he turned off the water and vomited.

* * *

He was in the waiting room, twisting that ratty baseball cap between his fingers. Meredith watched him, amazed that a man who cared about this girl so much would ever do anything that horrific. She yawned, backing away from her safe corner, and returned to her patient…Elizabeth. She read over her charts and scanned over her blood work. She was in bad shape.

"Go home."

Meredith turned around, fumbling with her chart. "What?"

"You look like crap," Mark said simply, taking a seat. "Go home."

"It's fine Mark," Meredith insisted, turning away. "I've been here this long. I might as well stay."

"No. You go home. I'll stay."

"You don't have to do this," she shook her head, moving closer to Elizabeth.

"I want to," he nodded, touching her shoulder. "Please…let me do this for you."

She looked up, her eyes locking with his. In that moment, she felt like crying. She wanted to bury herself in his strong arms, and just forget the world. But that was not an option.

"Fine," she sighed, handing him the chart.

He took the chart in his hands, his fingers brushing slightly with hers. "Goodnight Meredith."

"Goodnight Mark."

* * *

She stumbled out of the car, her consciousness quickly slipping away. She needed sleep. Sleep would be good.

"Took you long enough!" she heard a tired voice exclaimed.

She gasped, turning around. "Who's there?"

Anthony emerged from the bushes, holding her shoes. "I wanted to give these to you."

She raised an eye brow, amused and disgusted that this man waited for her all night just to give her some shoes? "What?"

"You forgot your shoes this morning," he explained, "I wanted to make sure you got them."

"You could have left them on my door," she reasoned, thinking it was obvious.

"What's the fun in that?" he simpered, rubbing his eyes. "I must say though, it is past my bedtime."

"I would imagine," she giggled, taking the shoes. "Well thanks," she shrugged, heading towards her house.

"Wait that's it?!" he yelled. "I waited all night and you won't even invite me in?!"

She turned, a large smile plastered to her face. "Maybe tomorrow."

"I'm holding you to that you know," he flirted, catching up to her. "You can't run away from me," he smirked.

She laughed, pushing him lightly aside before jiggling the door open with her keys. "Then try to catch me."

* * *

_He was standing on the edge of the cliff, his hair rustling in the wind. He was about to jump, his arms spread wide. His eyes remained close, his mind only on her. Taking a deep breath he let himself go, knowing that as soon as he did, he would vanish. Suddenly, a strong hand pulled his arm away from the cliff, jerking him towards her. He stumbled away from the ledge, falling on some twigs. He looked up, gazing into the eyes of Meredith._

"_You saved me," he whispered, touching her cheek. _

_She smiled, kissing him softly. She slowly got up, walking towards the ledge. She looked back, giving him one last smile before falling deep into the abyss, vanishing from his eyes. _

**A/N: I know this is like so rare of me! An update the next day!! Wow. Hahaha, but I was just in the mood to write and when I am I just go on the computer and let my fingers go. So when I typed out that dream sequence at the beginning and end of this chapter I was pretty proud of myself because, in my opinion, I thought it was kind of clever. (of course I'm pretty biased…hehehe) But the first thing I want to say is that Derek has a problem. And it's not just about not having Meredith…he has a bigger problem so yeah I'll leave you hanging on that. And well, let's just say I have A LOT of surprises up my sleeve and I am so glad to be back with this story!**

**If you could, I would really love long reviews for this one. Those are my favorite! So thank you so much in advance for reviewing!!**


	4. Just a Dream

Mark rolled his neck, checking over Elizabeth's labs for the seventh time

Mark rolled his neck, checking over Elizabeth's labs for the seventh time. His eyes were drooping shut and he knew that if he did not get some caffeine in him, he would surely pass out right then and there. He slowly got up, wobbling a bit before the dizziness in his head dissolved and walked towards the door. He grabbed onto the hinge, glancing to the right and left before proceeding towards the elevators. He pressed the DOWN button, holding onto it a little longer than he should. The doors instantly clicked open and he stumbled into them. He watched as the lights flickered on and off at the top of the lift, each signaling a certain number. He leaned back against the rail, slowly drifting off into a light sleep. Suddenly, the doors clicked open, his head shot back up, and he began to walk casually to the coffee cart. No one was there, which was understandable for this hour of the night. He poured a steaming hot cup of coffee, holding the liquid up to his face. He took a deep sigh, inhaling the sweet aroma of the drink. After taking a few heavy gulps, he felt reenergized and ready to tackle anything that this patient would throw at him. He opted to take the stairs and began to slowly jog up them, blinking off his sleepiness. After he reached the fourth floor, he began to regret not taking the elevators. Soon, his jog turned into a walk, and by the time he reached the twelfth floor, the coffee was gone from his cup and his eyes felt just as sleepy as before. He stretched out his hands, yawning loudly as he walked towards his patient's room, tossing the empty cup into a trash can. He stepped inside, squinting at the bright lights in the room compared to the rather dark hospital. Rubbing his eyes he looked out to his patient…

…except she was no longer there.

* * *

Meredith stretched out her body on the bed, smiling lightly as she dug her face into the warm pillow. The scent of laundry detergent and lilacs eased up into her nostrils as she pulled the covers over her aching body. It had been a long day; too long. She steadied her breathing and eventually went into a light sleep, her snores taking over. She was about to drift off when a light sound came from her window. Her eyes shot open and she haphazardly rolled out of bed, rolling up the seemingly stuck window.

"What?" she whispered into the night, half asleep yet fully aware of her surroundings. "Whose there?"

"It's uhm…Anthony," the voice whispered back.

"Wait what?!" Meredith yelled, now fully awake. "What are you doing?!"

"Look I'm not a stalker and I'm not crazy," he nervously said, running a hand through his thick hair. "It's just that my stomach was all knotty and I couldn't go to sleep cause I kept thinking about your damn smile and you have just completely taken over my thoughts and that is scaring the shit out of me because I barely know you!" He tucked his hands into his jeans. "I'm never like this. Seriously, never. And if I were you I would totally call the cops. But I'm hoping you don't because I don't have that much money for bail."

Meredith grinned in spite of herself. "Well," she started, her voice soft, "What do you want then?"

"A fresh start?"

She leaned over the edge, smiling into the night. "Hi. My name's Meredith."

"Anthony," he laughed. "Pleasure to meet you."

"Pleasure to meet you as well," she mocked, backing away from the ledge. "Oh and Anthony?"

"Yeah?" he asked, a smile still engraved on his face.

"Um," she hesitated before taking in a breath and saying, "You could come in…if you like." She bit her lower lip, contemplating whether the statement was completely stupid or completely necessary.

"Actually," he started, backing away, "I just met you. We should probably take it slow." He grinned, winking before disappearing from her sight.

* * *

Derek shook beneath the warm covers of the on call room, sweat dripping from his face. He could feel the heat of his body slowly disintegrating, yet whenever he pressed his palm to his forehead, rushes of heat and perspiration would flow onto it. Something was not right. He looked at his palm, a slash of blood cut right through the middle. He clenched his fist, tucking it under the pillow. He swallowed hard, his body still violently shaking. He couldn't control it. He stumbled out of the bed, flicking on the switch. He glanced at himself in the mirror, his face so pale it seemed almost invisible. The blood rushing to his head caused him to wobble from side to side. A nagging pain stuck at his heart, forcing him to pull at his shirt. Quick, light tears and whimpers began to erupt from his mouth as the pain increased inch by inch.

"Oh God," he groaned, falling onto the cool ground. Suddenly, his shaking became less and less violent, his whimpering seemed to disappear, his eyes began to slowly drift shut…

…and his heart stopped working.

* * *

Mark stared at the empty bed, the creases of his patient's body still engraved into the sheets. The coffee cup slowly slipped from his hands; splashes of hot liquid jumped from the floor, hitting the bottom of his scrubs. He instantly pulled out his pager, dialing Derek's number. He would know what to do. He began to pace the room, running through the memories in his brain. He left to get coffee. He was only gone for five minutes! How could something have happened?! Unless…unless someone kidnapped her? He quickly checked around the bed, looking for any evidence that someone other than himself was in the room. He glanced under the bed, his eyes catching a mattered baseball cap. He snatched it, examining it from all angles. He checked the tag. Nothing. Shoving it into the pocket of his lab coat, he dialed Derek's extension number again.

"What the hell Derek!" Mark yelled to himself, seeing no response. He cursed under his breath, wondering whether to call Meredith about this. What would she say? What would she do but blame him? He didn't lose his patient. He couldn't have. Yet, in the back of his mind, the thought that he did still lingered.

"You are ridiculous!"

Mark looked up, hearing the yelling and cursing of…Rose?

"I'm ridiculous?!" the young man questioned, throwing his arms up. "Rose, I want a divorce!"

Mark leaned his head against the doorframe, listening intently to the conversation.

"Shhh!" Rose instructed, glancing nervously around the room. "Please don't say that. No one knows I was married."

"Then just divorce me! No one will have to know!" He spat back, making no attempt to lower his voice.

"Okay, okay," she surrendered, slowly backing away, her lips quivering. "But," she whispered, shaking her head, "Why do you want this so bad now?" The tears were filling in her eyes, and Mark could almost hear the rapid beating of her seemingly broken heart.

He sighed, tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "I met someone."

She snorted, wiping her nose with the back of her sleeve. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Please…" he began, placing a hand on her shoulder, "Please do this one last thing for me."

She licked her lips, hesitantly looking up at the man before her. She still loved him. She knew that. Even after her little infatuation with Derek, she knew that she still loved _him_. How could she just throw that all away? "Fine," she murmured, trying her best to control the tears as she scribbled her name on the piece of paper he handed to her. "Fine."

"Thank you Rose," he replied, tucking the paper beneath his arm. "This means a lot."

"Just leave," she sobbed, quickly wiping away the tears that were escaping. "Just leave Anthony."

**A/N: TOLD YOU I HAD SURPIRSES!! Haha so Anthony is really Rose's soon to be ex HUSBAND, not fiancé, whom she is STILL in love with!! And on top of that she lied about him being her fiancé! Hmmm I wonder why? Think on that. AND Anthony and Meredith are now heating it up (but Meredith does not know that Anthony was with Rose, and Anthony does not know that Meredith even knows Rose or works at the same hospital) while Derek is DEAD (OMFG! WHAT THE HECK KILLED HIM?!****), and Mark's patient is kid-napped and GAH!! It's getting really intense and it will only get more intense when Mark and (hopefully) Derek find out that Meredith is now involved with yet ANOTHER man. (and do not think for a second she abandoned Derek or Mark.) Because now that Derek is in this trouble and so is Mark…well, you will just have to wait and see. So please review…long ones too!! **


	5. You Can Be the Death of Me

Yeah it's been an entire year. Holy crap. A FREAKIN YEAR?!?! I know your probably all really mad at me and probably want to kill me but this was my first year of high school so I've been extremely busy with all my other work but I've been getting a TON of requests to update this story so I was forced to sit my butt down and write something for you lovely fans  thank you guys (if your still with me…) for sticking with this story. It means a lot to have such dedicated readers!

* * *

It was an intense pain. A pain that shot through her body like nothing had before. He got what he wanted. The divorce was final. How could she have let this happen? She was a good wife, at least she thought. She had done everything she was supposed to do. She cooked, cleaned, and even sorted his socks for him! But he didn't love her. She knew that, he knew that…yet she was still shocked by the request, morbidly sickened by the tiny paper she was forced to sign. Anthony wanted out, that was no secret…so the only thing let for Rose to do was to open that door she had locked him in for so long and let him roam free.

"He doesn't deserve me," she slurred taking back another tequila. "Not one bit!"

"I think you've had enough m'am," Tessa said, slowly taking back the glass. "You're a bit drunk."

"I just got dumped on my ass, and I know you don't understand this cause your still young but eventually they get bored! Aha! That's it! He was bored! I bet he is banging some 20 year old piece of shit white trash girl who only knows how to count the buttons on his shirt which I have sewn!" Rose explained, her voice horse from the alcohol and tears.

"I understand that," Tessa nodded, trying her best to sound sympathetic. But in the back of her mind, she was disgusted with the woman! "But no more drinks."

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Rose blurted, grabbing a handful of peanuts. "Do you?"

"Um…" Tessa stammered. Did she have a boyfriend? Mark sure wasn't a boyfriend. Was he? No he could not be! "I don't know."

"Bullshit," Rose spit, throwing the peanuts at Tessa's golden hair. "You do so!"

"It's more complicated than that," she replied, laughing nervously. "He's not the boyfriend type I guess. Plus we're sort of in a fight."

"Over what?" Rose coughed, licking the peanuts before flicking them into her cup.

"I don't know," Tessa shook her head, cleaning out a beer mug. "He likes someone else."

"Ha! Well at least he didn't divorce you!" Rose exclaimed, causing heads to turn.

"Alright miss that is enough. It's time for you to leave," Tessa instructed, handing her, her purse. "Stop wallowing."

"Fine," Rose surrendered grabbing her purse. "But know this kid…" she continued, leaning against Tessa, her breath tinged with beer and cigarettes. "If he really does like someone else he is not gonna stop."

Those words echoed in Tessa's mind the entire night…

…because she knew they were absolutely true.

* * *

He froze, his heart beating hard against his chest. What was he supposed to do? His patient, his miracle case…vanished? He tried to move. He tried to call for help but no words would come out.

"Derek," he murmured. "Derek would know what to do."

Mustering up all his strength, he quickly paged his old friend. Nothing.

"Dammit Derek you stubborn bastard!" he cursed, throwing his pager across the room.

It was late. Too late. No one was around at this hour. No one was there to help him. "Oh God, Oh God," he panicked, running his fingers through his thick hair.

The echo of snores and heart monitors radiated in his ears, seeming to get louder and louder as the minutes wore on. _Tick tock tick tock_

Not thinking, he quickly whipped out his cell phone, dialing the first person that came to his mind.

10 seconds passed…no one picked up.

He tried again. Then again. Then again, and again, and again…

Finally she answered, "What do you want Mark?"

"I need your help," Mark breathed, relieved and ecstatic to hear the sound of her sweet voice. "I lost a patient and I don't know what to do."

"Oh my God," she gasped. "Where are you? I'll be there in a minute!"

In that moment, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that if she were there in front of him he would lean down, grasp her face and kiss her. He knew in that moment that he loved her…

…but loving Tessa was something even scarier than loving Meredith.

* * *

She knew something was wrong. She had a feeling. Something was not right. Normally, she would just ignore whatever gut feeling she had and just move forward. But this was different.

"Something's wrong…" she whispered, shaking her head.

"What do you mean?" Anthony asked, snuggling up beside her. "That was amazing!"

"No," she replied bluntly, "Not that. I just have a feeling."

"What's your feeling?" he asked, smoothing her hair. "It's 4 in the morning…everything is fine."

"No it's not!" she insisted, her voice quivering. "Something is not right…"

Anthony sighed, falling back against the sheets. "What do you want me to tell you Meredith? Go. Go find out whatever is bothering you."

Without saying another word, she stumbled out of bed, throwing on her Dartmouth t-shirt and ratty sweatpants. "I'm sorry," she said to Anthony before slipping out the door and disappearing from his sight.

* * *

"I came here as fast as I could!" Tessa gasped, hugging Mark tightly. "Don't worry. We'll find your patient."

"Tessa I don't know what to do…" Mark wept, his voice broken. "I can't move, I can't breathe…"

"Shhh," she soothed, rubbing his back. "Where did you start looking?"

"That's the thing!" he yelled, "I haven't! I don't know where to start! I was gone for 5 minutes… 5 minutes Tessa! And I…and I…"

He broke down. All the emotions, all the problems that he had been keeping inside for so long suddenly poured out of him. Everything with Meredith and Derek suddenly unleashed itself, sending Mark into a full out breakdown. "I can't….I can't do this!" he cried.

"Mark!" Tessa exclaimed, grabbing his face so it angled toward hers. "You have to pull yourself together. I know this is scary and I know you have no idea what is going on right now but you need to focus."

He took a deep breath, rubbing his eyes. "Okay," he sighed. "What do I do?"

"Call the other hospitals," she instructed, pulling out a yellow book from the nurses' station. "I'll start. Go and search the place. She couldn't be too far."

"Okay," he agreed, beginning to walk toward the stairs. "Tessa?"

She looked up, the phone pressed against her ear. "Yeah?"

"Thank you," he whispered before taking down the stairs, determined to find his patient.

* * *

Meredith ran toward the hospital, her breath quickening. The sweat began to form on her brows, her legs growing weak.

"Dr. Grey?"

She stopped abruptly, turning to see the man who had stopped to see Elizabeth.

"I told you to report to the police station," Meredith panicked, backing up against a tree. "Don't come closer to me!"

"Please," he begged, his eyes saddened, "I'm not going to hurt you. But I did something."

She eased up, her eyes widening. "Sir," she began, her hands shaking, "What did you do?"

"I took her doctor," he said easily. "I took her."

Meredith's voice hitched in her throat, her face grew red and hot. "Where did you take her?" she croaked out, her heart beating rapidly.

"She's with me," he smiled, walking toward her. "She's safe with me."

Meredith began to breathe heavily. He was coming closer and closer to her, the scars lining his chin and lips becoming more and more apparent in the naked moonlight. "Please don't hurt me," Meredith whimpered, her voice fearful and low.

"I'm not gonna hurt you," he assured, grabbing her arm. "You just need to fix her."

"What?" she gulped, hoping that Derek, Mark, or even Anthony would jump out of the bushes and save her from this madman. "What do you want me to do?"

"She's bleeding real badly," he explained, showing the sticky, dried blood on his muddy coat.

"She needs to go back into the hospital," Meredith pressured, trying to escape his grasp. "She cannot stay with you."

"No!" he exclaimed, shaking her. "No! Now you do as I say or you will end up like that other doctor!"

Meredith paused. "What? What other doctor?"

"Shepherd," he said with a grin. "He's dead."

Meredith's blue eyes turned a pale gray, the color in her face vanished, and the beating in her heart suddenly increased. "What did you do to him?" she whispered. She was too scared to yell, too scared to fight, too scared to move, too scared to accept what he had just told her.

"Poison," he laughed. "I asked him to let me take her. He threatened to call the cops. While he was checking up on her I slipped one of my specialties in his coffee. Found him dead in an empty room an hour ago when I went to take Elizabeth back with me. Sorry doc. When you're dealing with a guy like me and you don't do things my way…you lose. You are always gonna lose Doctor Grey." He gave a light chuckle, amused at how frightened, broken, and alone she was.

"Please…" she cried, the tears pouring out of her. She felt like she was going to be sick, like her life was crumbling at the seams. This isn't real, she thought, this can't be real. "I love him," she sobbed, her breath quickening, "Please don't tell me he's dead. Please…"

"Maybe you can save him," he shrugged, pulling out a knife. "I was feeling overly nice when I mixed it. If you operate on him within the first 6 hours there is still a chance…but only if you do what I say."

"Anything!" she cried, the tears stinging her face.

"First, get rid of the other doctor working on her. Sloan I believe? He's looking for me. You set the trap, I'll cut him up," he grinned, the tip of the blade pushed against her cheek. "Then you'll do what I told you to do. Fix her so she lives."

"No!" she sobbed, her breaths heaving against her chest. "No!" she repeated, feeling that her entire insides were turning inside out. Her ribs were collapsing, her heart was exploding, and everything hurt. This wasn't how it was supposed to work. This wasn't how things were supposed to end. "I can't do that…" she quivered, surrendering. "I can't kill Mark, and I can't help you."

"So you'd rather me just kill you?" he asked maliciously, slashing through her cheek, the blood running down her face.

"Yes," she nodded, the pain of the cut non-existent to her anymore. "Save Derek. Kill me."

He gazed at her, shocked at her request. "You'd rather die?"

"Yes!" she screamed, crying harder than ever before. "Because that is what you do when you love someone! You'd rather die for them! You don't love Elizabeth! You tried to murder her!"

"Watch yourself!" he warned, arching the knife toward her heart. "I can kill you in a second."

"Just save Derek," she pleaded, kneeling down to the man. "Just save Derek, just save Derek, just save Derek…"

* * *

Thanks guys! This is a long update! Hope you enjoyed it! I promise I won't go an entire year without updating again ;) LOVE YOU GUYS ! please please please review cause that is the only thing that keeps me going!


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